Send in the clones. (Please?!?) & #PeepPimpage

ec-td-pp-dualporpoise3Last week there was another incident of some asshole on Facebook openly asking on her Facebook page for links to pirate sites for e-books “because she’s poor and authors make enough.”

I. Can’t. Even.

Contrary to popular belief, most writers do not make enough money to quit their evil day jobs. Hence why they have evil day jobs in the first place. Some people think well if an author is published they must be wiping their asses with $20 bills.

Nope.

There are the big-name A-listers like Stephen King. Maybe his toilet paper comes directly from the US Treasury, or names the likes of Tom Clancy and JK Rowling.

The rest of us? No.

Most of those A-listers are lightning strikes. The rare, the lucky, and usually people who toiled for years and saw lots of rejection slips before their hard work paid off.

And then there are the hidden currents of unicorn-rare mid-listers like myself. I am the primary breadwinner of my family, but we ain’t rich, believe me. If it wasn’t for my health issues, I could go back to work for a previous employer as a store manager and probably pull in $60k a year with far better benefits and be making more than I am now.

(Unfortunately, there are days I can’t even get out of bed with my fibromyalgia and my arthritis and I work in bed with my laptop. Or on the couch. So it’s not like I can work 40-60 hours in retail anymore like I used to.)

The writers like myself who make a living with indie houses and self-pubbing or a hybrid mix of the two are floating around in there somewhere.

And then some asshole comes in and asks for our books for free because we “make enough.”

Bullshit. Entitlement-minded bitch. There are THOUSANDS of legally free books on Kindle. Read those, you damn thief. Either that, or let me come in and take your stuff for free, because you make enough to even have Internet access or at least a smart phone from which you can access the Internet and read e-books on, right? So, gimme. Hand it over, sweet cheeks.

Meanwhile, I’ll sit here in my cave, stuck in my hamster wheel of editing and writing and editing and writing and not taking off a damn day and averaging about 12 hours a day at my laptop.

I want my fucking clones, dammit. Sci-fi promised me a robot maid, flying cars, and clones by now.

I am highly disappointed.

Meanwhile, until that happens, I’ll have to write and edit and then pimp my books and do my website and all the other stuff there is to do.

Don’t get me wrong, I love what I do for a living, and it’s my dream job, but I’d be lying if I said I didn’t care about getting one of those “lightning strikes” myself. I’d love to be able to be in a position where I didn’t have to stress and I didn’t have to work every. Fucking. Day.

Then some pinhead like that whiny bitch comes along and sticks a pin in my fucking faith in humanity and I just want to cry.

So thank you for all of you readers who ARE honest. (And sorry to rant.) I know most of you are honest and buy our books, and this rant isn’t directed at you. I don’t even care if people share the same Kindle account and read books on different devices, because at least the book was bought LEGALLY and it’s not being uploaded to some fucking pirate site (where, FYI, they usually stick malware on your system, haha karma means fuck you, file sharers).

I’ve got a new one releasing on Monday, Dual Porpoise. It’s book 5 in my Placida Pod series and is Wyatt and Marisela’s story. I’ve always pictured Wyatt as a younger Idris Elba. (NOMMY!) You can pre-order it from Siren-BookStrand now.

http://www.bookstrand.com/tymber-dalton

My next one after that is Rhymes With Orange (Suncoast Society 35, MMMF, BDSM), which releases on July 4. (Talk about a “bang!” LOL)

And The Fire Road (Triple Trouble 10) has been submitted to Siren. (Woot!)

Still slogging through edits on The Great Turning books 2 and 3.

Meanwhile, I want to pimp some peeps.

You can find all my books as Tymber on my Amazon Author Page there.

Excuse me while I go see if Amazon Prime can deliver me a clone machine 2nd Day Air…


Now Available:

Coming Soon:

I have a spreadsheet of all my books under my various names with the buy links to all the vendors! 🙂

I’ve got a Facebook page! 🙂