I’m both an introvert and fall squarely inside the “highly sensitive person” type of personality. Meaning I frequently get labelled as shy or unfriendly or standoffish, when the truth is, I’m not. Frequently, that’s a coping mechanism.
Put me ON a stage, or in front of people teaching or presenting, or hell, doing karaoke SOBER (yes), I’m fine. I’ve done community theatre, given presentations, all of that, I’m fine.
Put me in a room with a few people I don’t know and expect me to make small talk? Holy crap, where’s my Xanax.
So for my fellow introverts/HSPs, here are a few links to show you no, you’re NOT alone, and it’s info you can hand off to the people in your lives who don’t “get” you.
Are you an introvert or an extrovert? An HSP? How do you cope with being an introvert/HSP? Do the people close to you “get” you? What do you wish people understood about you?
The Highly Sensitive Person
http://www.the-open-mind.com/10-ways-introverts-interact-differently-with-the-world/
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/08/05/an-introverts-office-surv_n_3670946.html
http://www.fastcocreate.com/1683402/your-guide-to-interacting-with-an-introvert
http://www.forbes.com/sites/susanadams/2013/05/07/six-ways-introverts-can-be-more-powerful/
http://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2003/03/caring-for-your-introvert/302696/
http://lifehacker.com/an-introverts-guide-to-surviving-a-weekend-with-strange-1576554766
I am the proverbial wallflower among a roomful of strangers until I begin to feel comfortable and familiar with topic of conversation. Few people really know me, and most of those close to me do NOT get me at all [sadly, a few are close family members]. Nor am I comfortable on stage, possessed of the worst case of stage fright ever.
I have been labelled a “highly sensitive person”, which I take as a compliment to the chagrin of many. As I enter the later decades of life, I have stopped apologizing for who and what I am. No one says you have to like me, me least of all, but I refuse to change who I am to please anyone. I like who I am…a flawed yet caring, loving person who tries darn hard.
Wow we could be sisters tymber. Reading this is exactly how I feel and am. I hate standing in front of people but I live to teach. So if we are sitting it’s better. Most of the time you will fined me hugging the wall if I am in a place we’re I dont know anyone. But once I get to know you look out, mischief starts. Lol I have learned to hide this part of me so well that my family does not see the real me sometimes, my fault cause it’s a part I don’t like. I see this has a weakness where I want to appear strong, bold adventure some.
It is nice that all this stuff is coming out about introverts lately. Maybe people will understand our need for quiet and space. When I was a stay at home mom I would enjoy an evening out a couple times a month with the other moms. Now that I’m working everyday I am worn out and meeting up is a real chore. I’m so ready for quiet time in the evenings.
I am absolutely an introvert but I’ve no trouble standing up and out. I used to adult-teach and have stood on a stage in front of 500+ peeps with no issues. I can’t say I’m a HSP. My introvertness arises from my INTP, my weird Gemini Sun coupled with Scorpio Moon & Ascendant aspects, and the fact that I live 95% of my life on the interior, not the exterior. Being a Domina, I’m used to being stared at like a freak. Honestly, I don’t care to “fit” in with anyone or any group. People drive me crazzzzy and I’d much rather be alone or with my very highly screened and selected Certain Someones than endure “normal” company. Besides, I have a tendency to say things that others find offensive and I’d rather avoid the googly eyes and dropped mouths. I’m not a huge fan of gaping holes.
Hi, my name is Vanessa and I am an introvert! 🙂 Thankyou Tymber, for this discussion. You may have been talking about yourself but you were also talking about me. From my teens until my thirties this was a source of great angst for myself. I was considered a self contained person, an “unsociable bookworm” by others. Not many have taken the time to know me but I am blessed with a few really good friends. In my 20’s & 30’s I had a number of roles which required me to give lots of time to others and speak to/ train large groups of people. On topic that was fine – I knew what I knew but the small talk before and after was tortuous. I love having what I call “deep and meaningful” conversations with people but I also like returning to the quiet of my home or creating space. Into my forties I became much more comfortable with the person I was/am that other people’s opinions do not carry the same importance. I am a good person, kind, thoughtful, loyal, loving, empathetic. I like the me I know in my fifties. I am more comfortable with my “introvertness” happy with my alone time which allows me to be even more creative in the media I choose. Thankyou because now I have words to use when people tell me they are worried I have developed a “social disorder like a fear of leaving my home”. No, I am just happy to be solitary, sometimes. Fortunately my hubby loves me as I am and is happy to let me be. We have travelled a bit in recent years and meeting lots of new people – the larger groups have been stressful for me – the smaller groups have been much more comfortable. On future trips I will use some of this advice. Reading others comments is wonderful as there are other people like me [smile].
I am totally introverted and honestly extroverted people wear me out mentally LOL. I do better in small groups, but in small groups where everyone is introverted is so awkward. At least someone has to be there to carry the conversation forward. I have found my voice over the years, but still have many situations where people just talk over me. Glad to know I am not the only one that feels this way and that there is absolutely nothing wrong with being introverted. <3
I am a total introvert. I’m fine speaking in front of people, but being around a large group drains my batteries.
I took the Birkman personality test years ago and I am selectively social. It’s totally true. Put me in a room with a lot of people and I’m going to find a small group rather than flit from person to person.
I changed schools a lot in elementary and middle schools and people would tell me they thought I was stuck up. I just didn’t know what to say to break the ice. I’m better now, but it takes a lot of work to be outgoing and engaging with people I don’t know.