Mevi Maynard and Portnoy’s Oyster… (NSFW)

When Tilly finished playing with Mevi, his wrists and ankles were unclipped, but she didn’t take off the blindfold or ballgag. A throw was draped over him, and fingers caressed his hair.

He sensed Doyle close by from the scent of his deodorant, but wasn’t sure where, exactly.

Then he heard the door open and close and sensed someone had left.

When the strong arm encircled his shoulders and helped him sit up, he realized it was Doyle.

“Good boy,” he hoarsely said. He let Mevi lean on him over to the couch and helped him get settled, his head in Doyle’s lap as he processed and floated and let his emotions begin to settle as he softly cried.

This time, he cried because he wished it’d been Doyle the entire time, not Tilly.

Now he knew what he wanted.

Who he wanted.

And he suspected if he admitted it, he might lose Doyle forever.

But…honesty was demanded.

And he was tired of lying about who and what he was.

Later, after saying good-night to Tilly and heading back, he stood in his bathroom and looked at his marks. When he turned, he gripped the edges of the counter and met his own gaze in the mirror.

He couldn’t even remember what the silver hair looked like on him now unless he looked at a picture.

This was who he was.

Who he’d always been.

“I’m gay,” he whispered to his reflection. “I’m submissive.”

Immediately, he felt like his soul adjusted one cog sideways and slid perfectly into place. Like his life-long struggles had just…ended.

Like that.

He took a deep breath and stood a little straighter. “I’m gay, and I’m submissive.”

The world didn’t end.

Lightning didn’t strike him.

He let go of the counter and stood with his spine straight, looking dead-on into the mirror. “I’m a gay man, and I’m submissive. My name is Malcolm Maynard, and I’m a gay, male submissive.”

He felt…lighter inside.

Freer.

And he’d never go back to the way things were.

Now, he just needed to figure out how to move forward.

Time Out of Mind (Suncoast Society 43, MM, BDSM) by Tymber Dalton. Coming January 23, 2017

Follow the Time Out of Mind Facebook event!